by Deb Garraway
September 28, 2010

Rules for the Man of My Dreams

The man of my dreams understands my need for space


This post is actually a continuation of my previous one on “The Rules of Love Poetry”

in which I question some of the rules, standards, and expectations women may link to the idealized “man of my dreams”.

Before I met him, when I thought of the man of my dreams (who’s actually my current husband), I knew I needed much more than a list of qualities. I recognized that something had to change in either the way I was pursuing the man of my dreams or in my expectations for him and our relationship together. It turned out to be both.

I needed to get clear about what I wanted, which may sound simple to some of you, but I assure you it wasn’t easy. After two previous marriages and a couple of long-term relationships, a light bulb finally snapped on making me aware of the perspective from which I’d been pursuing a partnership. I wanted a romantic partnership, not the traditional concept of a relationship or marriage from my mother’s era. (more…)

by Deb Garraway
September 25, 2010

Rules from Love Poetry

Will I perish without the love of my life?


“So dear I Love him that with him, all deaths I could endure. Without him, live no Life.”~William Shakespeare from Romeo & Juliet

It’s three hours into my five-hour flight to Hawaii with my sisters for our annual getaway. We just finished watching the movie Letters to Juliet about a young writer, Sophie, who travels to Italy with her fiancé. He turns out to be extremely passionate about his restaurant business but not so attentive to her. While they’re in this beautiful, romantic town of Verona, the place of Romeo and Juliet’s ill-fated love, Sophie’s fiancé immerses himself in work and leaves her alone most of the trip. Sophie finally decides that she didn’t miss him that much (the cute guy she met influenced her a tad too). She dreamily concludes that any woman who believes a man is the love of her life would want to spend “every moment with him”. I flinched. (more…)

by Deb Garraway
September 22, 2010

Is This How to Get A Man Who Doesn’t Cheat?

To get a man who’s faithful....make less money?


YIKES! I just read an article in the HealthDay News that says a man is more likely to cheat if he makes much less money than his wife or female partner does.

It also reports that a woman is more likely to cheat if she makes more than her husband or male partner. The study, which surveyed 9000 people under the age of 27, found that more than twice as many men cheated on their partners. The study author revealed that her impetus for the study was a male friend’s confession that he cheated on his partner because she made all the money, and he felt completely powerless. While the overall percentage of cheaters was small in her study (7% of men and 3% of women), infidelity seemed to rise when one partner made a lot more money than the other. My research indicates that about 50% of women and 60% of men cheat at some time during their relationship;and infidelity has more than doubled in the past decade. (more…)

by Deb Garraway
September 19, 2010

Mr. Right Can Feel Your Energy

Oh wow! This one's gotta be my Mr. Right


So here’s one of the problems we women experience in our quest for Mr. Right.

When you meet a man who seems to be perfect for you (and you for him), have you noticed what happens to your energy? What I mean by your energy is literally the way your body vibrates and the signals it’s sending out into the ethers. Others feel the vibration and interpret the signals even if words haven’t been exchanged. For many of us, that energy runs so high and fast that it takes on a life of its own–which is something we don’t want to happen! Here’s why. (more…)

by Deb Garraway
September 16, 2010

The Love of My Life Ain’t A Hearts & Flowers Guy

The man of my dreams has swagger


Hm..Hm..Hm. Some of us sure love a rugged man.

You know, the kind of guy with a working man’s hands, doesn’t mind getting dirty, maybe a little on the wild side. Then there’s the guy who’s cool, intriguing with a bit of swagger about him; and don’t let me forget the unpredictable, untamed guy who marches to the beat of his own drum. Oh! And what about the strong, silent type that you love to watch working with a jack hammer or scaling a tall building. I’ve dated all of them. Hahaha!…Yeah, really.

The love of my life loves me & his tractor

I went a bit overboard with photo images in this post because I realized how many different types of men there are out there, and there’s no way I could have typecast all of them. Today I was thinking about all the great guys out there that a woman could call the love of my life. What I realized is that a lot of these ruggedly intriguing, swaggering men aren’t the hearts-and-flowers kind of guys. And that’s okay. (more…)

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