A Love of My Life Romantic Fantasy


True love or a fantasy love of my life?

Currently I’m reading a romance mystery novel that contains an intriguing whodunit;

but on the romantic side, it’s the same old common storyline that I’m sure you’ll recognize from novels, TV and movies. It’s about a single woman reporter who tracks down a key witness to a murder, and on arrival to his home located on a secluded ranch, she finds it unlocked with no sign of the man. Hours go by, so she decides to wait for him and falls asleep on his sofa. She’s awakened with a shotgun pointed at her by the surprised witness, who just happens to be a ruggedly handsome brute. He’s angry at her intrusion, and after a few minutes of bantering, he decides to frighten her away by stripping naked, forcing her against a wall, fondling her breasts and brutally kissing her. She can’t resist his masculine force (not to mention his ripped body), and within seconds they’re in bed in fiery copulation that she’s never experienced before. After sex, they resume their heated battle of the wits; but in the end, he becomes her soulmate.

This storyline reinforces the ridiculous fairy tale (more like soft porn) that the way to find the love of my life is to be overpowered by a man’s animal magnetism and sex appeal and to succumb in passionate abandonment resembling something close to rape. Now, you may think this is just a silly grade “B” fantasy storyline (and maybe somewhat sizzling), but it’s been such a long-surviving, universal plot that we don’t recognize the influence it has on our subconscious romantic expectations. I believe many women subliminally perceive this scenario to be the path to finding her fantasy love of my life. She waits for a man to sweep her off her feet in irrepressible lust and rescue her from a dispassionate life.

I seriously think this is why so many of us tend to get hung up on the bad boys. The defiant feeling is wild, uninhibited, and satisfies a yearning and insatiable hunger for passion in our lives.

Do Love and Life Differently: When you meet a potential soulmate or love of your life, ask yourself if this is fulfilling a secret fantasy or if he’s the real deal.

I’d like to know your opinion on why women are often attracted to bad boys.

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