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To Find True Love Choose to Love

“I believe love is primarily a choice and only sometimes a feeling. If you want to feel love, choose to love and be patient.”~Real Live Preacher

Help! I've fallen in love and I can't get out

The quote above speaks to me about our ability to make choices both in our lives and in love. But unlike choosing what you’re going to wear today or what kind of car you’re going to buy, to find true love takes patience.Like this Real Live Preacher, I also believe that love is a choice. I know that for some of you who take the phrase literally that you actually “fall in love”, you might recoil at the comment that you actually “choose to love”. Maybe “falling in love” comes from the experience of being deeply in love and then losing that love.

It does sort of feel as if you fell into a dark manhole without a ladder to get out.

But the phrase also implies that love is an accident or an uncontrollable fate. (more…)

Prune the Past to Find True Love

Pinch back to find true love

This morning my husband and I were working in the garden, and he asked me why my potted petunias were especially beautiful this year.

They’re fuller, more vibrant and healthier than we’ve ever seen them. I told him I finally realized I was supposed to pinch back the dried out and dead blossoms to allow the new ones to grow and flourish. We talked about our many rose bushes that are regularly pruned by the gardener, and occasionally my husband gets pleasure from pruning and later seeing more luscious roses appear. He then mentioned he’s curious if I believe there’s a metaphorical meaning about pruning related to people and to life.

As I thought about it, I told him I believe pruning is symbolic of the cycle of life, where the old die and babies are born to grow and age to carry on life. Everything living eventually dies to prepare for the new to arrive, hopefully advancing our personal lives and our culture. Then it occurred to me that the same applies to letting go of old romantic relationships to make room to find true love. (more…)