Blog

The Oracle of Love Poetry

Love poetry and a picnic can be yours too

If you’ve never believed you get to choose your dream man, then you may not have given serious thought to how you go about it. If you wander around my blog, you’ll find lots of information on how to visualize your own dream man, which is one of the first steps to attracting him into your life for real. It all starts with clarity—figuring out exactly what qualities in a partner will be the best match for you.

Now you may think you already know what you want in your dream guy, and perhaps you do. But if the only guys you’ve ever dated are falling far short of your ideal, maybe you want to take another look at what those ideals really are. (more…)

How to Get a Man Like Buying a Car

Lucky me...way to buy a car AND get a man!

Being in the midst of looking for a car online, I started thinking about the similarity in the process of how to get a man through online matchmaking services.

Online dating wasn’t as widely used sixteen years ago when I was “on the market”, but the comparison with my car search gave me a real sense of how overwhelming the process can be today. There are a gazillion brands and models of cars with a multitude of options and price tags. I know my price range, so that makes it a bit easier, but not much.

(more…)

Fear of Success in Finding Mr. Right

If I find Mr. Right, it may turn out wrong

Are you fairly confident in your overall personal package – looks, financially stable, no baggage

– but when it comes to finding Mr. Right, you get feelings of pressure around sustaining a good relationship once you’ve found it? Perhaps you’re a high achiever and worry that you won’t be able to meet potentially higher expectations from your dream man or for your relationship. Could it be you’re afraid of commitment? Or, is it possible you have a fear of being “found out?” What I mean by that is the fear that Mr. Right won’t think you’re all that special once he gets to know you well. (more…)

Rules for the Man of My Dreams

The man of my dreams understands my need for space

in which I question some of the rules, standards, and expectations women may link to the idealized “man of my dreams”.

Before I met him, when I thought of the man of my dreams (who’s actually my current husband), I knew I needed much more than a list of qualities. I recognized that something had to change in either the way I was pursuing the man of my dreams or in my expectations for him and our relationship together. It turned out to be both.

I needed to get clear about what I wanted, which may sound simple to some of you, but I assure you it wasn’t easy. After two previous marriages and a couple of long-term relationships, a light bulb finally snapped on making me aware of the perspective from which I’d been pursuing a partnership. I wanted a romantic partnership, not the traditional concept of a relationship or marriage from my mother’s era. (more…)

Find True Love by Chance or Choice

This is no way to find true love

I really do love this quote.  I wonder how many people believe they have choices in what happens in their lives.

 How many believe life just happens, and they have no control over events?  To me, this is a victim mentality that causes people who think they have no influence to continue to create or allow situations in which they can remain victims.  This sounds pretty cold-blooded, but it’s true and I’ve personally experienced this at times in my own life.  It’s so much easier to blame others for things going awry in our personal lives. 

I know how difficult it is to recognize that we create everything that happens to us in our lives, as well as what doesn’t happen to us. In other words, we can create situations where we don’t get what we really want. My philosophy is that I want to live and die by my own sword, as the saying goes; meaning I can accept what happens to me—good or bad—as long as I’ve made a conscious choice. (more…)